What Do You Need For a New Baby?

Baby Wenos is 29 weeks today. My pregnancy email update says he’s 2 1/2 pounds, about the size of a butternut squash. Which just makes me hungry for butternut squash soup …

Anyway, Nick and I have an awesome friend, Haly, who is expecting her first child in February with her husband Joe. (Feb is a popular month; we have four other friends expecting). Haly emailed me asking for advice on her registry. I felt flattered and even loved re-capping getting ready for Lor. And what I remembered is worth saving for Lor. And Baby Wenos – we are getting your room ready and have all this stuff for you! Here’s what I sent her:

“I’m going to send you my ideas, and if Nick has any, he can chime in (he seems to have a better memory of those first months with Lauren than I do. I was sleeping, trying to sleep, or breastfeeding).

First off – we were cheapos! We got Lauren’s crib for free, and after measuring the slats (Google the guidelines – you don’t want your kid’s head to fit through), it was kosher. We got the bedding off craigslist.com (unisex – Lauren was a “surprise” – moon and stars). So I’m not sure how to tell you to shop for a crib. Our high chair came from a garage sale.

We got a Boppy and a Bumbo from craigslist.com, and these were the BEST. They are not creatures from outer space. A Boppy is a U-shaped pillow that goes around your middle and allows to you breastfeed comfortably (or helps the baby drink a bottle) with the baby on top of it. A Bumbo is a seat that allows your child to sit, even if they can’t hold up their own neck yet. Great for spoonfeeding the babe when they move on to solids if you don’t have a travel high chair. Both retail for over $50 each (I need those patents!) so try to get one used, or maybe a few people can go in on them in the registry.

A vibrating chair or swing is nice for your free hands. I would say you don’t need both, but that’s just me.

Likewise, a Baby Bjorn or a sling is nice and easy to get used (they can also be $50 and up). You probably don’t need both – most moms I know are partial to one or the other.

Receiving blankets, hats, bibs, pacifiers (if you decide to use them) – good gifts, and you can never have enough.

A bassinette – nice to just put by the bed for the first three months, but baby could go swaddled in the crib and you could skip it.

Diapers – register for sizes newborn, 1, 2, 3 and you’ll save $.

I was disappointed by Diaper Genies and I just throw my diapers in the trash. Some people like them, though.

Car seat – we got two bucket style car seats that have bases. You can unsnap the seat and clip it onto a shopping cart. Ours were Evenflow and Graco. If you are taking a birthing class, they have a “car seat day” with dolls. You can do it! If you aren’t, Google your area police – sometimes they have clinics on how to properly install a car seat.”

*Nick added later (what a good dad. Makes my heart melt):
- Baby monitor
- Infant bath tub – this fits into a kitchen sink with a little hammock to keep them from moving
- We had a changing table that worked great. You can also get a curved shaped pad that sits on top of a dresser as long as it isn’t too tall. It keeps them from rolling over while changing
- Car seat cover – great for the winter, it fits around the car seat to keep them warm
- Socks – they don’t really where shoes right away but socks are good
- Kids books
- Rocking chair

A lot of stuff for a little peanut, and I’m sure we didn’t even hit everything …

Moral Support

A salute to the things keeping this big mama happy in her 28th week:
- A copy of Hope Edelman’s “Motherless Mothers” from the library. Edelman wrote “Motherless Daughters” in the mid-1990s, and a copy was gifted to me by my English teacher when Mom died. When I found out Edelman has a new book out, I found “Motherless Mothers” from a few years back. Her interviews with other “motherless mothers” and stories of her two pregnancies are a tremendous comfort.
- Getting back to a few sessions of BODYPUMP weight class brought back adreneline and good spirits, and cutting out early because “I can’t do” the ab section is fabulous!
- Low-calorie hot chocolate. It’s nicer outside now than it was in October, but I still bust it out.
- A solo shopping trip on Halloween morning, where I Christmas-shopped (earliest ever) and Nick spent time with Lauren. In the mall, random people walked by in Halloween get-ups, Williams-Sonoma pushed Thanksgiving menu items (too expensive), and Hallmark geared up for Christmas with ornaments.
- An “Elmo’s World” DVD from the library, starring Tina Fey as a pirate. Ah, Tina, I love you so.
- Lauren lighting up when watching said DVD. What is it about Elmo that makes kids gravitate toward him?
- Moving Lauren into her new pink bedroom downstairs. I miss her upstairs, though!
- Crayola Hassle-Free Watercolor Paints. You wet a washable pen with a water strip, put the tip in paints that ONLY have an opening big enough to hold the pen, and apply to paper, and suddenly Lauren is entertained and I can get dinner done before Nick gets home. Genius. She may have moved on from the paper to her left arm with the purple – but hey, it washes off.
- Being invited to things: I’m going to lunch with a friend on Friday and a baby shower later this month. It’s nice to be social.
- Random co-workers gifting me with old boy clothes. Yes, I will take them!

Sam is 2

Lauren and I attended the 2nd birthday party of Lauren’s friend Sam. What a difference from last year: instead of talking about almost-walking and weaning (and the presidential election), we’re talking “big kid beds” and potty training. Sam enjoyed his cupcake; Lauren took three bites and ate a little more later. She loved the balloons and Sesame Street plates .

Leaves and Pumpkins

We got some great shots with Lauren admiring the leaves on a road trip to Richland Center one Saturday. And here she is, obsessing over pumpkin “guts” (and wearing my shirt as a smock). She likes the lit pumpkins, but didn’t have the attention span to watch the carving.

Toddlerdom. One day, Lauren insists on lovingly walking between Nick and me, holding each of our hands, and behaving well in a restaurant as we celebrated our fourth wedding anniversary. Another day (and the low point of my week), I was already tired and cranky from work (and still pregnant) and she slapped me across the face and called me “Mean Mommy”. (I was putting her in the car and she didn’t want to go). I grabbed her hands, looked her in the eyes, and said, “We don’t hit. It hurts Mommy when you hit her.” And then the week got better, and my father came to visit. Lauren showed off for him and called him, “Gay-pa Tom.” She loves her crayons and asks us to draw “fowers” and when you do, tells you when it’s “my turn” to draw. She calls my belly “brother” now without prompting. You take all the moments, and you try to remember the good ones.

Third Trimester: Glucose Test Day

Monday, October 12 started off in an interesting way – Lauren woke up at 4:30 a.m. She has been alternating perfect sleeping nights with nights waking once or twice. Sometimes we give her milk. Sometimes we just rock, clutching her petite body to our chests until she nods off. Only in the most desperate of times do we scoop her up and put her in bed with us.

We lay together in the bed, not sleeping, until about 6:15, where I gave up and dressed her and fed her breakfast. At this same time, I realized that the glucose sample (a bottle of flat, orange-soda type substance) I was supposed to take before the doctor’s appointment that day was still rolling around in my car. I couldn’t eat two hours before drinking, and I had to drink an hour before my 9 a.m. appointment. Nuts – I should’ve eaten at 4:30.

We went downstairs and watched a DVD from the public library, “Sesame Street Sleepytime,” which is hosted by Big Bird and it’s all about sleeping. Lauren sits still for the whole 30 minutes, snuggled in my shoulder, while I doze. She never sits for any other TV show, and when we have the rare opportunity to watch “Sesame Street” together, I think of a picture my mother took of my dad and me when I was young, on the couch watching “Sesame Street,” and I feel the generational pull.

The glucose tasted terrible, and I went in for my appointment and drew blood. The heartbeat is still strong, and the appointment was fast.

I am keeping a running list of names on the fridge for you, Baby Boy. Your dad is still not sure of any choices but I got him some name books from the library for inspiration, and I know he’ll agree on a perfect name when he feels it in his heart. Your mama is scared because she’s already gained 25 pounds with 12 weeks left to go! You will be a big guy, I know it!

From Fall to Winter in Two Weeks

Nick, Lauren and I visited a pumpkin patch last weekend. Here she is admiring the farm cat, who I thought was a dead ringer for our old cat Franklin. Checking out the collection of gourds, too, and our annual shot of her with massive amounts of pumpkins.

This weekend, the three of us caught the first half of the SP Cardinals homecoming game. To prepare for the 50 degree night temperature, we first put on Lauren’s adorable new heart sweatshirt (courtesy of her cousins’ hand-me-downs) and her winter coat. The next morning, the first flurries of the season fell.

We quit on the big-girl bed movement, but are working hard to transform our guest bedroom into Lauren’s new bedroom. I asked people for advice, and it seemed like 3 was the magic number. I asked Nick’s sister, who said Jess moved into a big bed early to be like her big sister (hmmm, Lauren doesn’t have one of those). I asked another friend, who said if Lauren wasn’t climbing out of her crib, we didn’t have a problem. The final verdict was some research on babycenter.com, which mentioned two-year-olds don’t have the cognitive development to understand the invisible confinements of a bed, and three-year-olds may be ready. So we’re getting a second crib from one of my co-workers for now.

Lauren is really good at saying everyone’s name that she meets, and she calls herself “Yoren”. Then I was on the phone with her aunt Liz and she couldn’t stop saying the background, “Yiz! Yiz!” Funny.

She is also preoccupied with saying, “Poop! Poop!” and we ask her if she needs to sit on the potty. “Yes.” Most of the time it’s just for show, but Thursday night she did poop and we heaped praise on her. Kaye was on vacation this week, and Nick stayed home Friday with her and visited the bathroom “at least five times”. I had a great time taking two days off to take Lauren to library storytime/singalong, the children’s museum, and swimming indoors, and a sub filled in for the rest of the time.

Girls’ Weekend 2009

Nick’s cousin Sara and I show off our bumps. The babies are both boys!
Lauren with her cousins Sam, Jess and Brayden. Nobody wanted to settle down for this picture!

I planned to have the women from Nick’s side of the family over for a girls’ weekend since we haven’t gotten together, just girls, for a few years. We did a Wildtree food tasting with my co-worker Jodi, enjoyed a beautiful day at the park, and headed down to Monroe Street in Madison for the Monroe Street Festival. Everyone brought a dish to pass, and I provided some things, which made it really easy! Brayden was the lucky gentleman who got to spend time with us, and Lauren lit up every time someone new came through the door on Friday night. She was excited to see her cousins (and tagged along all weekend as they “took care” of her) and gave toys one by one to Brayden (hopefully she’ll entertain her younger bro in the same manner) but she rocked back and forth in my arms with delight when Grandma and Kayla stepped through the door.

Things will change in the upcoming months and I can’t travel for Christmas, so it was especially important for me to have family around. Even if we had to kick Nick out for the weekend.

Great Lauren Moments from the Week

* Lauren says “Poop” and about half the time, she actually has it in her diaper. Once this week, she told me before its occurance and we made it to the potty for the first time. Another, she woke up crying with a big blowout. It’s amazing to see the first signs of awareness here.
* We got her new comforter and sheets on the bed in her room. She was fascinated with the guardrail to keep her in. But, her first night in it, she stayed awake for an hour past her bedtime. (And she looked like such a tiny peanut in that big twin bed!) I put her back in the crib at 9 p.m. and she was sleeping in less than five minutes.
* She spent part of Tuesday night with Color Wonder and watching Sponge Bob Square Pants – all from inside one of our laundry baskets.
* Lauren trotted over to the open pantry Tuesday morning and pointed up, “Rai-sai? Rai-sai?” requesting a breakfast of raisins. Of course, waffles and milk completed the meal.
* She can put her number puzzle together by herself.
* We bought her a toy castle for $5 on Craigslist.com and she loves opening the front doors. Nick sticks a character through the door and she laughs!
* She helped clean up at Kaye’s and stood, looking at Kaye when she was done. “Well? Thank you, good job?” she retorted when Kaye didn’t say anything immediately!
* She noticed I had flowers on my skirt this morning.
* We’re talking a lot about the little brother coming up, and she kisses my belly willingly.
* She’s still really preoccupied with showing off her belly button, asking to see yours, and telling you your watch goes, “Tick, tock, tick, tock.”

Run Day, and NordicFest

Nick and I were coordinators for our church’s Fall Festival 5K Run/2 mile walk, held at 8 a.m. Saturday, Sept. 12. Our annual family reunion (Nick’s dad’s side, affectionally dubbed “NordicFest”) was to take place the same day, 3 1/2 hours away. Nick’s brother Ryan and Ryan’s fiancee Jessica helped us set up, ran the course, and traveled to the reunion with us – good sports all the way. Friends graciously watched Lauren for us Friday night and Saturday.

Picture #1: Our start line, pictured at 6 a.m. after we went out and sent up directional arrows for the route. Nick hung the banner the night before, with lots of laughs from Ryan, Jessica and me.
Picture #2: A tent on the grounds which served as awards stage, water station, and food.
Picture #3: A close-up of our donated bagels and fruit.

Great weather and a successful turnout. I wish I had pictures of the crowd but from that point I was just too busy. We were cleaned up by 9:30 and hit the road by 11, picking up Lauren and lunch along the way. It was nice to see everyone at the reunion, but then the room started to spin for me, so I napped while Nick took Lauren on a boat ride and fed her supper.

Picture 4: Lauren and cousin Sam.
Picture 5: Lauren and “Uncle” Calvin playing “speed Patti-Cake” (don’t ask; it made her laugh!) We laughed at the similar hairstyles

It’s A Boy!

(Insert 20-week sonogram shot here; CD from doctor isn’t working)

On Sept. 4, we visited the doctor for our 20-week sonogram. Kaye requested this particular Friday off, so I was home with Lauren and she had to come to the appointment, and Nick was going to meet us there. With mama-brain, I’d confirmed the appointment, assuming it was in the clinic we had the first sonogram, but it was at the hospital where Baby Wenos will be born. Fortunately, they are a few buildings away from each other, so Nick and I raced in. You get to be up to 15 minutes late before your sonogram is cancelled, and we were 10.

In the waiting room, Nick read Lauren a children’s book while I tried to settle down. I don’t like to be late as a rule, and I was praying the baby was healthy. Finding out the sex, as we agreed as a couple to do, was secondary. “I try to limit my caffeine intake to one a day, and Lauren turned out fine when I did that with her,” I told myself. “That turkey lunch meat you ate by mistake won’t give your kid two heads,” I promised.

Inside the sonogram room, I pulled up my shirt and they spread the warm gel on my stomach (I know this gel used to be cold, and I’m so glad they invented gel warmers in time for Lauren’s sonograms). Mama-brain take 2: I’d forgotten to pack Lauren a ton of toys in the diaper bag, but she behaved well, playing with a doll the sonogram tech provided. Mama-brain take 3: I also forgot the 20-week sonogram can take up to an hour. Spine OK, check. Brain OK. Little feet and hands and my nose. Beautiful blood flow. I squeezed Nick’s hand and tried to relax. Being on my back is uncomfortable.

“And what do you think it is?” the sonogram tech asked, focusing in. Um, it was pretty obvious.

“It’s a boy!” Nick said, as ceremoniously as he’d said “It’s a girl!” the cold December night Lauren exited my body. I liked finding out this way, without the exhaustion on labor clouding my thoughts. Happy tears fell as I let the news sink in. “Our family will have one-of-each,” I thought. Then, “Can I be a good mom to a boy? Nick will have to help me understand him,” then, “We’ll need some clothes.”

And then Dr. S came in to review, and pronounced Baby Wenos healthy, and our family of four got a little closer to real.